Blog

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Hello!

Thank you for visiting my blog!

Most of my current content includes pieces of our journey to parenthood through infertility.

I am passionate about sharing our unconventional road to parenthood to contrast the filtered joy and beauty we see online and through social media. I hope that through sharing the brokenness behind our moments of beauty, I can help make the world of infertility a less lonely place and inspire others to share their own stories. For more info on me, visit my About Me section.

Mother’s Day Still Brings Me Sorrow

Approaching Mother’s Day After Infertility & Miscarriage I am a mother to a daughter. This fact still brings me shock and awe. There is rarely a moment that the reality of how difficult it was for us…

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I Still Sometimes Feel Broken

What It’s Like to Be TTC After a Miracle Baby I kiss my daughter’s perfectly squishable cheeks as I lay her down for bed. I watch how she curls her legs into her chest and puckers her…

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To the Baby I’m Praying is in My Belly

[On the night before learning our IUI was unsuccessful] Sweet Baby, Even though right now, you are just a wish and prayer, I want you to know that I love you. You are not just a desire—you…

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The Gift of You

Our sweet baby. God’s precious gift to our world. I will never be deserving of the gift of you.  When I first became pregnant with our daughter, I must have questioned a thousand times what I could…

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A Brief History of Januaries

The Beginning of Our Family January is a month that represents so much for our sweet family. Not only has it been a month of complete heartache and distress, as it was in January 2017 that I…

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A Series of Promises, Part IV

Vacant Horizon You are good. I’ve spoken these words too many times to count over the last few years. Too many times to count, I’ve spoken them recently in a state in which I’ve been overwhelmed with…

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New Year, New Perspective

It’s been easy for me to forget that we have so much to be thankful for. Although 2018 was filled with beautiful destinations and adventures in foreign places, with countless laughs shared with each other and many…

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The Time We Were Almost a Family of Three

When Foster Placements Fall Through I am standing in front of a room that I’ve just spent the last day and a half getting ready for a little boy—looking through drawers, digging through the closet, sorting through…

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The Twists and Bends to Twenty-Seven

As another year of this crazy, awesome, unpredictable, scary, exhilarating thing I call my life comes to a close, I find myself yet another year speechless and amazed as I watch the glowing flames melt the shining…

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As We Begin This New Adventure

Becoming Foster Parents To all the sweet children who will be sharing our home, I know our time together may be short. For you, it may just seem like one of a dozen stops on an unpredictable,…

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Letter to Our Baby, Part III

From: A Series of Promises, Part III March 2017 Our Perfect Little One, God has been speaking to me again. So clearly that it’s overwhelming. More clearly, in fact, than He ever has in my entire life. God…

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A Series of Promises, Part III

A Likeness of Gideon Starting fertility treatment was a terrifying thing. Not only was I going to be putting my body through an incredible amount of stress, but upon agreeing to try three rounds of fertility drugs,…

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Letter to Our Baby, Part II

From: A Series of Promises, Part II February 2017 Our Sweet Baby, Things have been harder than usual waiting for you. Even as I’ve been trying harder than ever to cling to God’s promises of you, I’ve been…

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A Series of Promises, Part II

The Song and the Sermon It’s hard to predict the kind of things that are going to set me off. I never know what kind of things are going to prompt that hateful, pulsing lie that’s become…

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Letter to Our Baby, Part I

From: A Series of Promises, Part I December 2016 Our Precious Little One, Last night I had a dream that God was standing beside me. As your dad and I slept, He was standing beside our bed watching…

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A Series of Promises, Part I

The Light in the Window I had a dream that God was standing beside our bed in the middle of the night, watching over us as we slept. I always close our curtains at night, yet when…

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When Grief Shakes You

This is Infertility Seven years ago, we reconnected. It didn’t take long for us to fall in love. We were so alike that it didn’t take much; we just simply fit together. Three years ago, we were…

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When Hate Upturns a City…

What do we do when hate seems to be winning? I’ve been completely overwhelmed with sadness, anger, and fear over what happened this past weekend in Charlottesville. I was in shock for so many reasons, but one…

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Storm Clouds Over 26

 As another year of this crazy, awesome, unpredictable, scary, exhilarating thing I call my life comes to a close, I’m left feeling speechless and amazed once again as I watch the glowing flames melt the shining wax…

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Scattered

I’m in pieces Floating, fluttering, flying Split, divided, Grasping, trying To fix me, dry My ever crying Eyes and keep my Mind from lying Telling tales And crafting fears I shout but no one Ever hears Or…

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Your Love Will Change the World

The world is dark The world is cold But you are bright And you are bold. You’re sunshine, kindness, Color, light, Amid this hollow Calloused fight. You’re life, you’re love, Your presence gives Us confidence That good…

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Broken by Breaking Bad

Why Breaking Bad is the Most Brilliant Show I’ve Ever Seen… Okay… So I just finished watching the television series Breaking Bad, and this is how I feel… My mind = blown. I confess… not only I…

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The first time I saw you again

The first time I saw you again, everything changed. It was the first of many laughs, many smiles, many stories, many memories. It was the start of something greater than I could have ever imagined. It was…

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Let Us Not Forget Our Friends

Let us not forget our friends We’ve lost over the years. The world cries, yet through the cost of you You’ve calmed our hurt and fears.   You’ve cried for us, and fought for us So now…

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The blessing of twenty-five birthdays.

As another year of this crazy, awesome, unpredictable, scary, exhilarating thing I call my life comes to a close, I’m left feeling speechless and amazed as I watch the glowing flames melt the shining wax on twenty-five…

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100 Miles to Healed

Running was my first true love. It was the first thing that had ever made me feel like my life had meaning. Running was what made me realize that there were beautiful things to be discovered, there…

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